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recently, i was asked if my blog name was in reference to the song by the band “faith no more.”  I responded, “not consciously.”  now I’ve read their lyrics, numerous times, and I’m not really sure what they’re going for in their song, so I can’t even answer the question accurately.  I have not actually listened to the song, though my husband seemed to think it was really funny that I chose this name, knowing that band and knowing the irony this created for how he understood me.  however, I will say that my name was more so in reference to letting go of my ego and of the ideal and trying to sit with what is real…..and finding out that reality is actually quite miraculous and beautiful 🙂  

so i asked myself the question…what is my driftwood? or like the Buddhist tradition asks, what kind of driftwood am I?   what is my ship?  what am I holding on to?  what happens when I let go and drown and become smaller and smaller and can I actually do that?  what is my ship?????

many traditions ask of us to “remove” the “self”; to “die” unto ourselves; to be eclipsed by the heart of the universe; to “let go” and “let God”….though many of these sayings are abused and may even seem trite, my name claim for my blog was intentional for reference to this idea.  when i truly surrender, I find that the happiness I find is something more beautiful than I imagined.  it’s happened a number of times and God seems to always give me just what I need.  I hope I can remember that on my hardest days.  Recently, I’ve been singing sarah mclaughlin’s song “surrender” to remember some truths in my heart:

what ship will I go down with?