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I can’t imagine not encouraging other people to listen to Kodaly’s Mass. I can’t believe how beautiful it is; there’s no aspiring to match with something like this- ever- but i am here in tears thinking about the unknown, my penitent heart, and deliverance and am moved beyond words.

there’s this beauty that just wants to kill us, i think, as it’s the only way that we can become a part of it. maybe that’s terrible “theology” but it is seemingly my subjective experience of it all. i don’t know my theology very well, so feel free to correct me…i just feel that the sublime is transcendental and to achieve it we have to dissolve into it…

i feel like Kodaly’s mass gets that.
that’s what i want my Mass to convey- that as undeserving as we are of this union with the beauty of creation, we are given that opportunity through both repentance, reflection, and transformation.

sometimes there’s just so much feeling that there’s no way to express it except to transcend it.

this doesn’t mean that i stand any chance at it, however, it does mean that i feel very motivated toward this transcendent light- like flying, like soaring, like the silence that feels like vibrations of God. oh, this holiday season is going to be a good one, i can tell just by how my heart feels 🙂

Merry Christmas.